Boner threat inspires stricter legislative dress code

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In spite of public outrage, some feel that the Montana Legislature’s new Victorian era dress code isn’t strict enough.

“We can’t have our lady legislators sashaying around all tarted up like Jeannette Rankin,” said a modesty code advocate, “or it might get our ‘family values’ in a bunch, if you know what I mean.

“Some of these freshmen haven’t been to town much, and their only exposure to the feminine mystique has been sneaking peeks at reruns of Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman.

“Seeing a lady’s neck, all uncovered, first thing when they get to the big city is just asking for trouble,” he concluded.

Another proponent of a stricter legislative modesty code explained that it wasn’t intended to be discriminatory to women, just to alert female lawmakers to sinful thoughts that they could cause by carelessly drawing attention to their baby-making parts — and to guide them to wise decisions about how to dress, think and act.

“We’re pleased to welcome the wives and mothers of Montana to the legislative floor, but we certainly don’t want them causing any tent-pole action,” he said.

He added that the new code seemed professional to him, and that it wasn’t as strict as some.

“For example, there’s nothing in there about a legislative menstrual hut.”